So here I am, sitting on my window sill , looking out at the horizon and just letting my wind wander free. So many things run across my mind - many don't have any kind of logical connection to one another, and in an attempt to capture the essence of the thought process I decided to pen down the thoughts in my head as they come. Right now I don’t know whether to post it or not,
because its going to be the ramblings of a restless mind and may not make sense
to many.
I have always been able to be sensitive to other people’s feelings and
provide them advice that has helped make a difference.
From my view point there is nothing complicated with our lives, all that is
needed is good sense, patience and a dollop of wisdom. Not that I'm smart and super awesome .. lol. I'm just an ordinary girl like any other. No one is perfect, but anyways, for most sensitive people the things that people do are revealing- it takes us to
their minds, and it’s like their thoughts are easy to read and why they do things that
they do- their innermost desires – the things they want as a result of their
actions, which even they may not be aware of.
Now to the ironical part of my entry. When it comes down to my own case.... well I’m blind as a bat searching around in a dark and cluttered place! I
have no idea what I want, why I do things I do and the sense of relation I have with people and things... I feel like I am many people at once- the good
person, the bad person, the good person that I admire and want to be, the bad
person and their qualities that I secretly and sinfully am attracted to and
want to emulate.. all this just merges together and forms this complex whole-
my personality. I just don’t know who the real me is. This is one question that haunts us all. Who am I? Really? Is the real me the person
who helps out the old women in the old age home or is that this
other image that I want to reflect in society? Am I the person who loves babies
or do I just do it because its considered an attribute that is inherited because of being a woman? Do I really
enjoy ice creams or is it because my mom bought me ice creams as a treat and
forever afterwards I considered it a treat?... all this, I don’t know- and many
more. I often feel like Alice, falling through that deep dark endless hole,
following a crazy hare who is a stranger to me ( how naughty of
Alice, don't you think?) , when I think about who I really am... am I
a good person? Or am I a bad person? And how do u really define good or bad?
In Hindu mythology - Ramayana, Rama is the hero, the good guy, whereas Ravana is the big bad
wolf. But was it really so? The ethical dilemma arises when Rama banishes his
faithful and loyal wife and along with her his rightful heirs, for his kingdom
and his people... What about his responsibility towards his Wife, the meaning
of sacred bond of marriage, the responsibility of a father towards his sons? On
the other hand there is Ravana, who has several valuable qualities, an example
of which is the fact that he never touched Sita or misused her, his enemity
with Rama did not make him behave like the monster he is supposed to be
,towards Sita.
So who is the Good guy and who is the Bad guy?
The definitions of Reality seem blurred and non- existant, the only truth seems
to be the stories passed down from generations, the things that sounded right
to the listener was passed on , some realities were edited and the world we
live in is a filtered world where reality takes the form what the powerfully
positioned person wills it to be.
On a lighter note , "The Matrix" makes sense in this context.
